THE BLACK GHOSTS
Words: Cameron Cook

London's The Black Ghosts first came to our attention when we heard, quite by chance, their groovy electro-pop version of Olivia Newton John's "Physical", a reendition that almost surpasses the original in terms of raw awesomeness. After witnessing this veritable feat of pop magic, we delved further and deeper into the band's budding catalogue, and frankly, their upcoming debut album leaves absolutely nothing to be desired in the indie-dance-worhty-of-your-fanatism department. Their current single "Anyway You Choose To Give It" sounds like Megaman disco dancing with Crystal Castles, and the reigning Best Song of the Summer, "The Repetition Kills You", is so mind-blowingly good there's really no point in even talking about it.

We caught up with Simon and Theo from The Black Ghosts recently and chatted them up a bit. We'd like to preface this interview by saying, FINALLY, someone owned up to thinking the Killer sound like Meatloaf. 'Sup thanks you, Black Ghosts, from the bottoms of our hearts.

Hello, The Black Ghosts. How are you?
Theo: We are just splendid, thanks.

We're all loving the current explosion of indie dance music, but when do you think the pendulum of popularity will swing back to dour-looking men playing the guitar?
Theo: To hell with the pendulum! Who cares about the shoegazers and grunge monkeys.

Simon: I think the dour men playing guitar will become dour men playing synths, fight the dour!

You recently covered the epitome of modern pop music: I am of course referring to the brilliance that is Olivia Newton-John's "Physical". What brought along this stroke of genius?
Theo: We were asked to do it. These guys were getting a whole lot of bands to cover, or at least interpret, that song. So we thought it was worth a go. It threw the crowd a bit at a recent gig though - divided opinion!

Simon: Yep it's a love it AND hate it type of song, freaks people out, us included.

Why do gay men love you?
Theo: Because we are fabulous and unattainable. Or maybe it was just the moustache - R.I.P.

Simon: Everyone loves us.

If you could go back in time and exterminate any musician, Terminator-style, who would it be? Twist: in the same journey, you would have to save a politician from being assassinated.
Theo: Hmm. There are many who inspire derision and irritation, but I don't know if any actually deserve death because of their music. It would have to be 'cos they were an utter cunt as well. And I wouldn't save any politician, because then time would have taken a very different course, meaning that you and I probably wouldn't be here today. Dry metaphysical answer.

Simon: I would crucify Cliff Richard on the Top of the Pops Christmas special, not because i really hate him, i just think it'd look cool and freak out the Christians who wind me up. I would save John Lennon who would have become a politician, hopefully that would change the future enough to ensure Coldplay would never come into existence.

Your album is fantastic, because it's both very influenced by the '80s and the '00s, completely leaving the '90s by the wayside. Was this a conscious choice?
Theo: Not at all. In fact, we like the 90s. This album is the first time I have revisited production styles i was doing in the 90s, so to me it has that element to it. My version of the '90s anyway.

Simon: I'm well into the '90s too, i think we've used '80s influenced sounds and '00s production techniques but put together with a '90s attitude.

Keeping the previous question in mind, give me your honest opinion on The Killers.
Theo: I am completely ambivalent about The Killers, as I am about most of the big bands out there. People get so annoyed by bands. I couldn't care less. Maybe it's cos I don't listen to the radio or watch crappy music TV.

Simon: I hear them on the radio in the morning, they don't do it for me at all... a bit too earnest. Sounds like Meatloaf.

What does your debut, big-budget video look like?
Theo: We have already shot our first video, for "Anyway You Choose To Give It". It's a Ridley Scott flavoured number, about Simon and I building a robotic band in a remote lab somewhere. It's great.

Simon: Yeah it was a laugh to make, we're looking forward to doing the next one. We've been inspired by the Wotless crew recently, check them out on myspace, they go out dressed in mental costumes. It'd be cool to do a video with thousands of Wotless people playing a huge game of British Bulldog.

How well do you think you will do in America, on a scale of 1 to 10, one being very poorly, ten being bigger than Depeche Mode circa 1990?
Simon: We have no idea, how much do you want us?

Couldn't you have come up with a better name?
Theo: No - because our name is excellent. You know the phrase "Cellar Door"? Well our name is actually the next one down on that list.

Simon: We'd be nothing without the name, it is the backbone to it all.

Anything to add?
Theo: So just to recap - that's Meatloaf, Coldplay, Cliff Richard and Wotless... Brraapp.

Amazing. Thank you, The Black Ghosts! Have a great day.